Intention

Have you ever heard the saying that if you want to hear God laugh, tell him your plans? I re-read this old quote today in a book I bought, Everything You Always Wanted to Know about Whole Foods but Where Afraid to Ask by Christina Pirello. It caught my interest because I am looking for recipes made with whole foods (aka veggies and real spices) and not fake veggie food. It just seems to me that fake vegan cheese is just as bad as any other processed food and is counter intuitive. The author does have some soy (aka tofu based recipes - there are 31 recipes that have tofu in them out of a 296 page book) but there are plenty of recipes with titles such as Colorful Vegetable Bundles, Spicy Vegetable Soup with Corn Tortillas and Apple-Filled Acorn Squash with Curried Hempseeds. I find cooking daunting in my busy days along with my children who like to complain if the food served to them is different; but I see the need to get better and figure out a compromise between all of us involved.

On the first page the author, Christina Pirello says, "If we disconnect with nature, our life grows dead and empty. To see food only as fuel to operate our bodies is to create profound impoverishment of the spirit. We can achieve intimacy no greater than that with our food. It joins with us, becomes us, helps create our character." I know plenty of meat-eaters with good character; but I think what she is saying is when we live our lives with purpose, when we see food as something more just the feeling we get when the receptors on our tongues relay the information to our brains that we not only feed our bellies but our human spirit. It made me think of my intentions with food and otherwise. (I have an opinion, right or wrong, that perhaps making plans is foolish, but a better way might be to live with intentions.)

Side note about plans: I have trouble with the concept of long term planning because I couldn't plan my young son's cancerous brain tumor. There was no way to see that coming and in that powerful moment all I knew was my intention, hope, and the sheer force of will. The only cancer that I knew of in my son's genetic make-up was in my family, my paternal grandfather who smoked (I hear a lot) and ended up dying of lung cancer – so from a genetic standpoint I couldn't even reason it. On the other hand, my dad's stroke, not really planned - but genetics, lifestyle and stress were all things I could see brewing in the cauldron.   I  had thought if it did happen, it wouldn't be until his 70's; another 10 good years away. Yet, these examples of the types of stuff that has made it difficult for me to come to terms with the word 'plan' for anything more than the short term. For me, knowing my intentions helps me to stay emotionally available to change with the circumstances and maybe, in a way, helps protect from the disappointment of failed long term plans.

1. My intention with going to school for Dietetics is to make a difference. Last night it came up in a conversation that if I work in the hospital most people will not be receptive to the nutritional instructions I may someday give. This is not a new thought for me. A week doesn't not go by when I don't notice someone either at a restaurant, walking into a store or even at a concert where I don't see the effects of stroke, cancer or other chronic diseases in the faces and bodies of some of the people I pass. I'm paying attention. I notice. And for some reason it moves my soul. When I see those who are battling chronic disease, I lose a couple of tears and it doesn't seem fair that they have to spend the later part of their life not living with all parts functioning. I feel, if the super huge ice cream chocolate cookie attack wasn't as addictive as cigarettes to a smoker we might have a few less obese, a few less stroke survivors dragging a leg or holding an immovable arm. This includes the hamburgers and fries we pick up through the drive though. I would like to see if our society was healthier would we be happier? I think happiness has to start from within and if we don't feel good, I can see how being happy maybe a struggle. Maybe it will only be one person's life I make a difference in. If so, I guess it is one more life that is lived a little healthier, spending a little less money on meds and hopefully able to spend a little bit of that money on leisure and not suffering from some form of paralysis the last 10-20 years of their life.



2. It is my intention to define moderation. It seems almost everything should be okay in moderation. Or is it? I hope to one day answer this question here. I am still looking for and uncovering an answer.



3. It is my intention to be an example navigating healthy food, becoming and staying fit, having healthy relationships and finding meaningful work. It is those four things I believe make a healthy life. It is my intention to share my struggles, as honestly as possible, because there are days my sugar addiction over takes me, stress overcomes my abilities to get the most out of my day.



It is never my intention to be an expert. Only to share what I have learned so far and the choices I am making. I am an evolving human, on a journey and, some days, (especially when raising 3 boys seems CRAZY) an adventure.

I do understand the difficulty of navigating food choices. The whole state of 'Nutrition-ism' can seem like an uncertain joke at times - perhaps because fad diets that have failed many. We learn to cook from our family, our culture also. It can be very personal, especially when we are struggling.



"Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways -- WINE in one hand -- strawberries in the other -- body thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and screaming "WOOOOHOOOOOO!!! WHAT A RIDE!!!" – Author Unknown



In the same moment I can understand the quote above. To me life is about feeling good as many days as I can. It’s about being able to run up the stairs to check on my kids, it’s about being able to do the same thing with my future grandkids someday. It’s about feeling good in my skin; it’s about my dreams to travel to Prague, South America, Rome, the southern part of France and being able to walk as much as I choose as I discover the different parts of the world. It is about being the best I can be for the loves of my live, the people who I care deeply about and care about me – who it would pain for them to see me suffer. It is about being able to prove to myself that I am capable to running a marathon if I want to or just decide to take up surfing a little later in life, and being able to. I enjoy living the most when I am able to enjoy life’s experiences with those people around me, sometimes new people and sometimes with those who can complete my sentences. I loved trying skydiving in my 20’s so much I did it a couple of times and probably would have done it more if it hadn’t been cost prohibitive for me; risk is not a foreign idea to me. I enjoy pushing limits, so I do understand the quote above in that sense. Yet, it is difficult for me to understand the concept of eating for the current moment all the time, on a daily basis (I understand an evening out with friends – I understand the yumminess of a warm chocolate chip cookie) and seems like giving up on happiness in a way to me. I, myself, struggle with chocolate chip cookies and cake, oh…I do. But I try not to excuse it – I know I won’t feel good later - especially if I don’t stop myself. There was a point when I could see that the path I was heading to was the same as my relatives with diabetes - for me it was then the excuses seemed inexcusable